It’s Royal Rumble night.
7:13 No one is here yet and I’m trying not to eat all the snacks before they get there. The sensor pad has quit on my brand new laptop. It’s not a hardware issue because it works before I log in. So I keep having to move my mouse to my laptop then back to my PC.
7:15 Hugh arrives.
7:25 We discuss spoilers and TNA. Hugh spills chips.
7:30 Here’s Justin. Very little chance of Nicole showing up at this stage.
7:38 Nicole begs off by email.
7:35 Beer #1.
7:41 Hugh gets confused because we are watching the WWE Experience not the PPV preview.
7:47 Ordering pizza becomes problematic.
8:00 We begin. Justin can’t believe I don’t like rum.
8:01 The road to Wrestlemania begins with a promo video.
8:03 Edge starts the show defending his title. Since the champ is coming out first I’ll assume we will hear from Vickie Guererro.
8:05 Yep. Vickie reminds us the Spear is banned.
8:10 We send Hugh to fetch the pizza to avoid delivery and tip charges.
8:11 Edge is just nto somebody I buy being limited to one move.
8:15 Justin describes an Indian wedding as we await Hugh and food. The match is still in the early stages so there’s not much to say about it.
8:18 The simultaneous Cross-Body taking both men down seems popular lately.
8:22 Pizza makes us miss stuff.
8:26 Some nice false finishes.
8:28 Kelly Kelly attacks Vickie.
8:29 A ref bump allows Edge to hit the Spear.
8:30 The ref wakes up and Edge hits an Unprettier for the win. Nice, but a pretty tame match.
8:33 We’re going right into the WWE title match now.
8:45 None of us like Michael Cole’s persona.
8:50 If a heel brings a lackey that lackey should interfere but I’d like to see Miz get a win on his own.
9:00 Miz tries to walk out. It is not to be.9:02 The Viper is coiled when the New Nexus, minus CM Punk himself, shows up for no apparent reason. Orton actually throws Reilly into the lot of them. Orton hits an RKO but Punk suddenly appears to hit Go To Sleep on Orton and Miz is able to cover and pin him. Hugh is completely baffled as to the reason.
9:06 Todd Grisham reads a prepared statement from Cody Rhodes.
9:09 Divas time. Two-on-one Handicap Match for the title?
9:11 E-GM pipes up. There are two clowns, literal clowns, behind Cole and even they are telling him to shut up. He changes the match to a Fatal Fourway and adds Eve.
9:15 Lay-Cool come face to face but nothing comes of it.
9:16 Double Sharpshooter.
9:18 Eve pins Layla while Michelle has Natalya pinned too and the ref only sees one so Eve becomes the new champion.
9:19 Beer #2.
9:20 Crap with Dnaiel Bryan, Gail Kim and The Bellas.
9:28 CM Punk has to come out at #1.
9:30 The Corre show up and surround the ring. The New Nexus comes out to turn it into a brawl.
9:31 Here comes E-GM again. He demands everyone return to the locker room.
9:33 The real #2 entry is Daniel Bryan.
9:34 Cole “Who cares about the Internet?” Justin “The government of Egypt.”
9:34 Justin Gabriel is now out for real.
9:35 Justin misses a 450 Splash and Bryan ELIMINATES him.
9:36 Enter Zack Ryder.
9:37 Bryan takes out Ryder too.
9:37 William Regal.
9:39 #6 Ted Dibiase Jr.
9:41 #7 John Morrison
9:42 john Morrison get thrown out but lands on the ring barrier and jumps back to the ring steps and back into the ring. William Regal gets dumped in the meantime.
9:43 Yoshi Tatsu.
9:44 Husky Harris comes out to join Punk. New Nexus is certainly outshining The Corre so far.
9:46 #10 Chavo.
9:47 #11 Mark Henry.
9:48 Henry takes out Chavito. Then Yoshi Tatsu.
9:48 JTG. When do we see some more good people?
9:50 Another Nexi, Michael Maguillicuddy.
9:51 JTG is out.
9:52 Harris and Maguillicuddy take out Ted Dibiase.
9:52 Chris Masters is #14.
9:53 David Otunga, another New Nexus man, is in the mix to help Punck.
9:54 Punk takes out Daniel Bryan. Then Nexus take out John Morrison.
9:55 Nexus takes out Mark Henry to leave just them in the ring. Tyler Reks has to try to fight them next. He doesn’t last long.
9:56 Vladimir Kozlov. He barely lasts a minute.
9:58 R-Truth. He also lasts a minute.
9:59 Marks the return of The Great Khali. Khali actually fights off the New Nexus and tosses Harris.
10:01 #20 Here comes Mason Ryan the last member of the New Nexus.
10:01 Ryan takes out Khali to return control to The Nexus.
10:02 BOOKER T!
10:04 Spinaroonie! But it gets him dumped almost right away.
10:04 #22 John Cena. This should break Nexus’s dominance. Yep, Cena takes out the whole gang except Punk.
10:07 #23 Hornswoggle!
10:08 Surprisingly, Cena dumps CM Punk and the story of Nexus is done for this Rumble.
10:09 Tyson Kidd.
10:10 Hornswoggle actually manages an Attitude Adjustment on Kidd who Cena dumps later.
10:10 #25 Heath Slater. Hornswoggle and Cena continue to engage in crazy antics.
10:12 Cena and Hornswoggle’s alliance continues to dominate as they take out Cena.
10:12 Kofi Kingston.
10:14 Lucky #27 Jack Swagger, he’s not going to win.
10:15 More antics with Hornswoggle.
10:15 Sheamus, who does not like Hornswoggle.
10:17 Sheamus finally takes out Hornsqoggle.
10:17 Rey Mysterio.
10:18 Mysterio takes out Swagger.
10:19 #30 Wade Barrett.
10:20 Dolph Ziggler enters despite losing a title shot earlier tonight.
10:22 DIESEL!!! He kicks ass but no eliminations.
10:23 Drew McIntyre. He and Sheamus team up.
10:24 Diesel has huge heat.
10:25 #34 Alex Reilly, accompanied by The Miz.
10:25 Barrett takes out Diesel and the crowd is not happy. Neither is Hugh.
10:26 Miz joins commentary.
10:26 Big Show.
10:28 Show takes out Ziggler. Not sure why he was in there.
10:28 #36 Ezekial Jackson. McIntyre goes, Zeke dumps Big Show without too much trouble,
10:30 Santino Marella.
10:31 #38 Alberto Del Rio.
10:32 Reilly went at some point while Del Rio was stalling on the way to the ring.
10:33 Orton enters before Del Rio even gets to the ring.
10:34 Sheamus and Drew McIntyre are gone.
10:34 #40 is Kane in his 13th straight Tumble.
So who is left?
Barrett, Orton, Cena, Mysterio, Kane, Ezekial Jackson and Del Rio.
10:36 Jackson gets dumped by Kane. Mysterio manages to flip Kane out but Wade Barrett knocks him out immediately,
10:38 Cena and Orton finally come to blows.
10:39 Miz and A-Rei combine to take Cena out of the match.
10:41 Was Santino ever eliminated?
10:42 Orton dumps Barrett and Del Rio dumps Orton! Del Rio is announced as the winner but Santino climbs back into the ring and hits the Cobra! But he can’t get him over the ropes and Del Rio reverses and Santino is out. Nice joke. Del Rio’s ring announcer gets to go wild announcing him.
As much as I love the ending the Rumble wasn’t that much. The two surprises mad no difference whatsoever, the stable wars never emerged and Nexus was out by the middle. Miz ticked off Cena so Del Rio can face Edge while Cena faces The Miz even higher on the card. No sign of HHH or The Undertaker, who I was expecting. The undercard was weak so I’m not that impressed overall. As Rumbles go it just didn’t seem special.
Now to bed.