Flashback: March 28, 2010. My Hollywood Dream posted a guest column of predictions for Wrestlemania XXVI. Little did anyone know what that column would become. Let’s see what’s changed since then, shall we?
First off, Batista was in one of the main event matches last year. He’s since retired, perhaps for good. Also defending a world championship was Chris Jericho, now off dancing with stars. Shawn Michaels lost a retirement match that night and has kept to his word and not wrestled since unlike my icon Ric Flair. Triple H made one of his last appearances until just recently when he faced Sheamus. These days Sheamus is lucky to have a midcard title and his last encounter with HHH left him humiliated. The streak is on the line once again as HHH gets a second chance nobody wants to mention is a second chance.
Remember when Bret Hart was back on TV? I do. I saw him win the United States Championship live and I would never have thought I’d be able to say that.
CM Punk has gone from the Straight Edged Society to the New Nexus to facing Randy Orton alone at Wrestlemania tonight. Edge is a champion, instead of a challenger. Heck, a year ago Alberto Del Rio didn’t exist he was still Dos Caras Jr. And nobody dreamed Mistico would sign with WWE and change his name to Sin Cara. Cody Rhodes was in a triple threat with Randy Orton and Ted Dibiase Jr. And everyone thought Dibiase had more upside. Now Ted’s not even getting on TV while Cody has a red hot feud with Rey Mysterio to settle in one-on-one action.
We still had a Money In The Bank match last year. We had no Rock, no Austin, no Snooki and Jerry Lawler had still never wrestled at Wrestlemania. The Miz was in a tag team with The Big Show. Now The Miz is in the main event and Show is in an eight-man tag along with a comedy duo and an awkward, face turning, Kane. Kane didn’t have that bad a year though as he held the World Heavyweight Championship for a decent run and got several victories over The Undertaker. Last year Vickie Guererro was actually wrestling. At least that’s improved.
But enough about last year. On to Wrestlemania XXVII and my live blog recap!
6:59 still short two guests.
7:00 We’re on with Kari Hilson singing America the Beautiful.
7:03 Rock time.
7:07 we get the preliminaries out of The Way and The Rock speaks.
7:13 I fall behind as guest #3 arrives. Justin and Mitchell are now here and only Nicole is expected. She’s stuck at a family gathering for now. Rock draws a “Fruity Pebbles” chant.
7:17 Justin “If he were to face it up any more he would kiss a baby.”
7:18 Rock gets all his catchphrases out and gets the crowd fired up then takes off while a video starts.
Mitchell “It’s a small African country’s budget worth of pyro for the opening.
Alberto Del Rio, who won the Royal Rumble, gets stuck in the opening slot. Christian is out for the match too. $1000, Bentley and the huge screens show us his estate. There’s Brodus Clay too.
Edge’s taped arm is, of course, the early target. Mania level bumps are coming early.
Mitchell “Oh Brodus Clay, you are too ugly for Wrestlemania.”
Justin gets in the first “Shut up Cole!” of the night.
Action on the outside between Christian and Brodus Clay.
Edge hits a Spear and actually wins. Edge winning at Mania? I’m stunned. Edge tries to beat up a Rolls Royce. Normally one would use a weapon for this. So here’s Christian with a tire iron and a lead pipe.
Cody Rhodes is up next. Mysterio is in Captain America gear. Someone I forgot was coming shows up.
Mitchell “Nerve pinch is a sign of a bad match.”
We talk tsunami.
Rhodes survives the 619. Rey steals Cody’s mask. But it’s not enough as Cody Rhodes wins using the knee braces as a weapon. I’m 0-2 on predictions so far.
Snoop Dog and Teddy Long. Bad talent competition to get lower card people and Roddy Piper on the show. HORNSWOGGLE RAPS! Real words! Wow! That was worth part of the price of the show.
8-man tag time. The Corres versus Kane, Big Show, Santino and Kozlov. Except Kozlov is still out from the previous beating so Kofi Kingston takes his place. Better! It’s very short and Heath Slater takes a Cobra and Big Show punch and the faces win and I finally get one right.
Rock and Eve. Mae Young! Austin!
Time for Punk/Orton. And it’s just a great match. Orton is really selling the leg. Ring Psychology is a rare thing now. Orton’s knee gives out on the punt, the Punk just escapes an RKO. Then Punk attempts a high flying move and Orton RKOs him out of midair.
Rock is with Mean Gene. And John Cena’s #1 fan is coming to confront Rock. It’s Pee Wee Herman. But Rock convinces him to change sides.
Hall of Fame introduction by Howard Finkel. Abdullah the Butcher is Canadian. HBK overshadows all the rest. Sunny looks great.
Now Cole and Lawler are up. Booker T and Jim Ross take their places on commentary. We get a lot of action on the outside before the match officially wins. Swaggerr interference lets Cole actually get in offence. An-Cole lock doesn’t win it and, when Jerry turns it around Swagger tries to throw in the towel. Swagger ends up with a Stunner instead. Fist Drop by Lawlwer but he breaks his own pin at two. Instead of a Piledriver Lawler put on an Ankle Lock of his own. Cole taps immediately but Austin makes a long show of confirming he wants to quit before ringing the bell. Swagger carries Cole away as Austin and Lawler drink in the ring. Booker joins them for a Spin-a-roonie only to get a Stunner for his trouble. But the RAW GM thinks the referee went too far and DQs Lawler retroactively. In a clear case if shooting the messenger Josh Matthews also eats a Stunner just for delivering the news.
HHH and Undertaker comes before Snooki? Hunter enters to Metallica’s For Whom The Bell Tolls and has a phalanx of legionnaires in front of him.
Mitchell “He can turn water into mist! He’s a wizard!”
Undertaker’s entrance has no druids or flash but still takes 4:17. JR and the King are back together again calling the match. They wreck the Cole Mine. Falcon Dive by Undertaker! Nota good looking one though. There goes the Spanish Announce Desk as Taker is slammed through it.
Mitchell “Man, these guys are wrestling like they only do it once a year.”
This is underwhelming so far. It’s like spot then a nap before another spot. HHH survives a Chokeslam, Taker kicks out of a Pedigree. Now Hunter kicks out of a Last Ride as well. Then he kicks out of a Tombstone Piledriver. Hunter gets a reversal and DDTs Taker on a chair. A second Pedigree doesn’t get the job done. Not even a third can do it. Hunter tries a steel chair. Even a chair shot to the head. They almost never allow that. Triple H even steals the Tombstone but it’s still not enough to stop Taker. Sledgehammer time! But before he can use it Taker counters with Hell’s Gate. Trips struggles for a long time. He almost manages to use the sledgehammer but loses it as his strength fades. In the end he feebly taps out and the streak reaches 19-0. That would have been good if a little of the filler had been trimmed out. Taker collapses after the match. It takes a stretcher buggy to get him out.
Snooki match is up. When will we see Daniel Bryan and Sheamus? Trish does most of the work. Morrison is never legal and Snooki amazes with the two moves she does before getting the pin.
I guess Bryan and Sheamus was a dark match because next The Miz gets an amazing entrance video. But Cena gets an all-black gospel choir. He also has a new red shirt. The early match is another series of spots with no story. Miz escapes an STF, Cena avoids a Skull Crushing Finale. The ref gets knocked out, Cena hits an Attitude Adjustment, but Riley hits Cena with a briefcase. Cena survives the return of the ref yet Miz also kicks out of a second AA. Both men spill over the barrier on the outside and we end up with a double countout. It’s all an excuse to bring in The Rock. Rock blows off the E-GM and restarts the match with no DQs and no countouts. But Cena gets Rock Bottomed and Miz wins the match and retains. Wow my predictions sucked. Miz doesn’t escape Rock’s wrath either. He ends up taking a People’s Elbow and Wrestlemania ends with The Rock on the turnbuckle raising an arm for the crowd.
I can’t say I’m really pleased with this. Everybody worked hard but the most spectacular moves were by Snooki and one dive by The Undertaker. Rock and Austin were little more than nostalgia acts and some matches went too long and some too short. Stacked up against other Wrestlemanias this one looks to be sub-par.
So that’s it. It’s been a fun year but a lot has changed in my life and recapping wrestling is more than I have time to do. I’ll still be watching. But I want to be able to just watch, and on my own schedule, not trying to see it ASAP to get these columns written. I know few people read this but I know, for some, it’s their only source of WWE information. And you know something? Once you accept that the Attitude era is dead and gone and we’re living in the PG-era now WWE programming is worth watching these days. With summer reruns about to descend like locusts it’s a good time to check out shows that run all year. Heck, you might even try giving TNA a chance. Or watch NXT on the web. I think Superstars is on there too. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll recap a PPV or send a note about something interesting every once in a while. I hope everyone continues to read the other fine articles at My Hollywood Dream. I could also do the occasional movie review. And who knows? The next time I find myself between jobs I may be right back here smarking out.
It’s been a pleasure taking this year-long ride with you. Goodnight and goodwrestling!